Infertility

For many people, creating a family is something they have always envisioned. For others, the urge to parent emerges later in life. Regardless of when a person decides to have children, facing biological barriers to that process and exploring parenting options can be challenging and stressful.

Often an individual wants to build a family even if he or she is single, or is in a relationship with a partner who is unwilling or unable to biologically help create a child. For individuals, infertility can trigger responses including loneliness, failure, frustration, confusion, overwhelm, grief and anger. Some people feel betrayed and experience a crisis of faith. For couples, infertility can sometimes exacerbate existing difficulties and create challenges to intimacy. Some couples find it difficult to remain supportive of one another in the process, and frustration emerges as blame or anger. For anyone, the stresses involved can undermine optimism and hope, leaving instead depression, disappointment, dejection, or bitterness. Dealing with infertility often involves complex medical procedures. This in turn can lead to concerns about money, stress, privacy, or loss of control.

Female and male fertility each present their unique challenges. It is important to remember that it is normal to have many feelings and reactions in facing the hurdles involved. In addition to finding appropriate medical care, it is important to get support for the emotional and mental stresses of this process.

A therapist can be particularly helpful in this process, especially one who is familiar with the medical procedures and timeframes involved. If you are dealing with infertility, therapy can provide support, and can be a place to brainstorm options and possibilities. In addition it can provide tools for clearer communication between partners, individuals, and the medical team, and can be a safe place to make difficult decisions.

I have experience working with prospective parents, and am aware of many options open to creating families. The Bay Area is a particularly rich area for creating alternative families and for finding qualified medical help in overcoming fertility obstacles.

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Links for further information about dealing with Infertility:

Fertility Plus - A non-profit website providing information written by patients, for patients about trying to conceive.

Surrogacy Alternatives - For families considering surrogacy, this website addresses many of the aspects involved. The information provided is a good sampling of important things to consider regarding surrogacy. Listing this site does not constitute an endorsement or recommendation of Surrogacy Alternatives, Inc.

Queer Parents - Website for Prospective Queer Parents, a San Francisco-based organization whose purpose is to provide a forum for the exchange of information and a social gathering space for queer (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, etc.) people who are interested in child raising and parenting.

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